I agree she is NOT a boy no matter her sexual preference. I have an ex of his in the picture too but her and I became good friends when I moved down here. He did tell me that he was trying to get back together with her just before him and I started dating and her and I kind of look a like so it was hard at first. If you aren't comfortable with her but felt that she should be in the wedding. You don't HAVE to invite her to other events it is after all your wedding and your parties. Do what you want and don't feel bad for not inviting her.