We're having a pretty modest, outdoor summer wedding and our budget is not all that big, because I am just getting into real estate and don't have a lot of money right now. My fiance is putting money away and my parents will be helping us a bit as well. I'm not how to or if I should ask my bridesmaid and MOH to pay for their dresses. 2 of them are students, both graduated this year so they will be working for about a year when I get married, which means that they will have some money at the point, but the third one is my cousin and she's kind of a beach bum. She takes random vacations for months at a time to places like Costa Rica, Mexico, Australia and comes home broke. I'm a little worried that asking them to pay for the dresses will put them in a bad position. I'm hoping that we will be able to pay around half of the cost, but that will depend on the costs of everything else.

Any suggestions on how or when I should ask them about paying for the dresses? I figure that by giving them a year to save some money that should be plenty of time but I'm a little worried and embarassed to ask about it. None of them have been BM or MOH before, nor are any of them married, so I'm not sure they know what all the job entails

Thanks!!

When I was MOH for one of my friends I assumed I would be buying my own dress, so they may assume the same thing. I would have a sit down with each one though and tell them your expectations for their part in your wedding, including parties, speaches, dress shopping, and dress buying. If they really have a huge problem with it then let them know you may have to re think their roll. At the same time though keep in mind how expensive it can be to be in the wedding party, so try to take it easy on their budgets too, if you are having a modest wedding you maybe able to find dresses you like at Macy's or a Ross dress for less. If you look you will find something that is pretty with a price that you all can agree on.

When I was my sis' maid of honor, I assumed I was paying for the dress, shoes, parties, etc. I agree that it is a good idea to sit down with your bridal party tho...that is probably the best way to lay it all out.

I don't think you should feel bad asking them to buy their own dresses. Have them shop at store that is not to big. The prices will be lower. My girls are paying their own dresses. The ones we wanted at a bridal store were about $119, then we went to a smaller shop and found a dress almost like the one from the other store but better for $59. if they feel they cannot afford it then you may have to ask someone else. If your cousin can go to all those places she can afford to get the dress.

Thanks for the advise. I'm going with my MOH tomorrow to do some dress shopping in Victoria, which means an hour and a half drive (both ways) so we'll have some time to chat about it there!

I agree all of ours are paying for their clothes, but my fh mom is making the dresses and vests, so the cost is les then normal hopefully

When I was in weddings, I had always assumed that I was going to pay for all the items that I would need to be a BM. For our wedding in September, I took all the girls to a national bridal place and told them that they could pick out their own dress they just had to be the blue that I picked out and floor length. This was a way that they could pick the dress that fit them and their budget the best. Another suggestion would be go to the mall after prom. There are dresses that are marked down to reasonable prices (as long as you can find one that you like).

I actually went dress shopping with my MOH yesterday and as she was trying on dresses, to see what would look good with the dress I chose. Once we both chose one I casually said to her, "of good, this one is cheaper then the others we've been looking at, it's only $150 so I don't feel so bad about making you spend so much on it". So that went over well.

Once I got home though one of my BM didn't like the color choice, which i kinda agree now that she's pointed it out. I wanted strapless, floor length satin and the ones we chose were black with a small bright pink tie/belt on them. She figures it will be too hot for a summer wedding that is outside, so I may switch the colors around and do the bright pink for the dress and black for the tie.

If you have any ideas about the colors please send me an e-mail! I think black would look really smart, and really they're only outside for a little over an hour, but at the same time I don't want them to be uncomfortable either..... Let me know what you think!

If you are going to be outside in the summer maybe a shorter dress would be more appropriate anyway, then if it is black it wont be as uncomfortable.

I think that you should go with what you want. I was in a wedding in July once and it was VERY HOT and not once did I think about asking the bride to switch the color or even think about it. Just remember it is your day and I think that if you want black strapless floor lenth gowns than that is what you should have.

Good Luck!!