This is my 2nd marriage. I was a young bridge 15 years ago, who planned for months for my special day, who also spent too much money and went through allot of stress.

Now, I am getting married again. Since, he has never been married, he wants a traditional wedding.

Do you think it is tacky for me to not want to wear a bridal gown? I have purchased an Ivory floor length dress with a matching bolero jacket.

AND, I do not want a cake--instead I am having wedding cake trifle, served in martini glasses........much cheaper and no waste.

We are both 40 years old and are trying to be financially practical!

I think it all sounds very nice. As long as your FH is okay with it, go for it. My FMIL got remarried in her 40s as well and she didn't wear a big traditional gown, she wore a nice floor length white dress. As far the trifle in the martini glasses, sounds yummy. I also went to a wedding where they had strawberry shortcake in wine glasses instead of wedding cake. I think as long as you keep some of the traditional things in your wedding, you and your FH will both be happy. Best of luck, and welcome!

I had the same exact issue when my husband and I married in 2004. It was my 2nd marriage and my first wedding (in1985) was the traditional, 400 guests, home church, dinner reception and dance social affair. Like you, way too much time, stress and money. The worst part was it happened in a blur and it was over...I remembered very little of my first wedding day. The costs?...$8000.00
My husband had not been married before and his only request was a traditional church wedding. I wanted something different, small, intimate and special that I could remember.
I was from Missouri and he from Mississippi...this meant major travel for one of our families. No matter where we would have chose between the two, local weddings just keep growing and growing.
So instead we planned a destination wedding in the Smokey Mountains. We had 46 of your nearest and dearest family members and friends with us. We had a gorgeous wedding and great lodging. The costs?...$5000.00
I have a destination wedding website with pictures from our wedding weekend. Check out the "Our Wedding Story" page.
Maybe something like this could be an option. It was the best decision we made.