Ok, this isn't so much a plea for advise, but just an opportunity to vent to people as stressed as me. I had a beautiful shower on June 9, but now it's hard to even remember the good time because of the days that followed it. My sister is my MOH and my best friend and fiance's cousin are bridesmaids. My friend lives in Florida (the shower was in Illinois) and my fiance's cousin lives in Missouri so my mom and sister planned most of the shower. My friend in FL was unable to attend since she and her family are all flying up for the wedding. My fiance's cousin showed up to the shower an hour late after some of the guests had arrived and all of the decorations and food had been put out because they had gotten lost. I didn't make a big deal about this because it was their first time to my hometown and the streets can be confusing. What really upset me was that she didn't do hardly anything to help my sister during the shower. My sister had to cut and serve most of the cake because when she asked the BM to do it, she served the people that she knew and then sat down. The worst part was that she had her MIL and SIL with her (which I told her to bring to the shower because they had come to visit from Iowa) so she left right after the shower was over without helping to clean anything up. My mom, sister, aunt, future MIL and I had to do all the cleanup. And...it gets worse. The next day my sister added up the total cost of the shower and divided it so that she and the 2 BM would each pay an equal share (even though she did all the work) and emailed the total to the girls. My friend in Florida agreed to pay her third and even thanked my sister for doing all of the work and for sending her pictures of the day since she was unable to attend. My fiance's cousin sent a reply email that she assumed that my mom and sister were throwing the shower and that the third was too much and she wasn't able to pay it. She is a nurse and makes very good money so I knew that was just an excuse. What really upset me was that she didn't even offer to make payments or pay some of it. She just flat out refused to pay any of it. The biggest insult was that 3 days later, she and her husband bought a treadmill. So basically, it's not that they didn't have the money... she just didn't have it for me. I'm not letting this ruin our friendship because she is my FH cousin and they are very close, but I will always remember this. Most of the great memories from the shower have been replaced with a weeks worth of bickering.

I haven't spoken to her much since because I am trying to heal and get over it since she will be standing beside me in the wedding. Thank you for the venting space.

Sounds like a bi*** to me! I don't even know if I would be able to let that go, so kudos to you. Not that I'm trying to bring you down, but you also are gonna be kinda screwed on your wedding day because she is obviously unreliable. Most bridesmaids are happy to help on the big day, but this one is obviously just not into her job.

Most importantly, don't let her ruin your wedding day. Just ignore her if she pulls any other stunts like this, you don't want to remember your wedding by the unreliable, careless bridesmaid you had.

Thanks KylesBride. Our wedding was last weekend and she didn't do or say much but I wasn't surprised. My sister (MOH) and other bridesmaid (also from Lakeland, FL) were awesome and helped me through it.

Hope your planning is smooth and your big day flawless...

Mrs. Kleine