So, I would love to have a bridal shower, but I really don't want any gifts. For one thing, my FH and I have lived together for 3 years, so I was struggling to find things to add to the registry that wouldn't end up tucked away in a closet (much like the espresso machine I thought I so desperately needed a few years back, lol). But I think the biggest reason is that I really don't like getting gifts from people. The whole wedding etiquette thing makes me really self conscious. I don't want people to feel like they HAVE to get me anything for the shower OR the wedding, or like I'm only inviting them as a 'gift grab'. There were years in the past where we weren't doing very well financially, and we opted out of going to weddings and showers where we didn't know people that well simply because we couldn't afford a decent gift.

When I was pregnant with our son, I had a baby shower where gifts were optional, but I heard later that the reason certain people didn't come was because they couldn't afford a gift. I really want to make it clear that I don't want any gifts for the shower, and not make it sound like 'I'm just trying to play the courtesy card, but secretly expect gifts from everyone.' Is there a way other than simply writing 'no gifts' on the invitation?

Just write on the invitations..."No gifts please, your presence is the best gift we could recieve".
If you think that will not discourage it...ask them to give to your favorite charity instead of a gift.

Another way you could handle it is to ask people to give you a favorite recipe or their best marriage advice instead of a gift. That way the guests still feel like they contributed something.

Or you could even have guests bring their favorite foods to the bridal shower to share with everyone.